I tell you what - driving home at 3am and being one of the only two cars on the road.. windows down.. tooling around at 35-40 mph... and having some good introspective jams on as you admire the rain soaked roads in the street lights and nature smelling all sorts of clean and wet is hard to beat.

That... that is one of the reasons why I don't mind helping close up shop at the 'Box. That sense of distance traveled, wind in the hair, Jeff Buckley/Alice in Chains/Radiohead off the Zune, and a job well done is a stellar high. Time to think and not be overly depressed by the conclusions; just an occasional juke of a deer or three.

.. like ponder the odd and cumbersome scene at my godson's first birthday where I was on the couch.. Mountain Dew in hand.. and I just panned the scene of the room.. most of the folks faded to gray, but my friends - their families - were super imposed on a event (pseudo similar) say fifteen years ago is crazy. I can see clearly the youngins we were with the world bright and full of possibilities, and now see those same people grown, careers in hand, with loves ones they have married, birthed, or took into their lives. It took a force of will (and a raw cheek) to not tear up knowing the unknown of 'back then' turned out pretty fucking nice for most of us now.

This evening was Pop's birthday at Big Freds. A nice evening of one sister, her husband, and two kids, Pops and his Wife, and the youngest and her hubby. After all this time it is... touching.. to see shit gel finally; with everyone. Bitter ephemeral animosity is either hidden better or let go and we can all enjoy some 'zza and mediocre service in the name of Pop's b-day. Though that fucking mule-slow vendor hadn't produced my iPad mini so that's up in the air. The pitched in gifts were hysterical in their immediate uselessness but promise of future tech.

... then tonight it was a four hour stint at the 'Box with the Sea Captain (who was in town for her aunt's second wedding). The stories she tells, the secrets she confesses, and the goals she has are quite remarkable... Very much a "I have a load to get off my chest and I need someone to sound post against it" sort of night. It is nice to know she would call - of all the folks in O-Town she knows - me and just hang out. At least another person who minds if I suck air in this world or not.

Ha.. that was more melodramatic that it should have been, but there's a nugget of truth to it.