Today is the first day of my "post CB" life. Things are not going well.

I have some mild anxiety that my productive life is over. Even with the albatross that is/was CB at least I was doing something productive and forward moving.

Today I have milled around reading sharepoint books on Safari and staring at this ‘design and dev’ doc. No defined forward momentum today. I am trying to get peppy and learn a new language or something, but it is hard to frame my time for that.

I get the uneasy feeling of starting a long rote walk into a dusty and dirty outlands. Something akin to when Judge Dredd (the movie) was kicked out of the Megacity and they clanged the doors behind him. Except I don’t have an awesomely large big gun to dispense law to the lawless with.

I fear I may go insane before too long. I can see how others on the team have sunk into apathy and benignly accepted this level of... existence... but not I. I am a builder, a shaper of digital dreams, and a creator. I have to resist withering away on this vine of indifference though all signs from management upwards point to my fate.

Aaaaargg!