05/09: The Talk!
So I think I just had my "talk" with my boss ten minutes ago (about 10.00 to 10.45). A little back story - I am on a project that has been going for a year and a half. There are mad difficulties with the way it was presented, work was dolled out, and what constitute a requirement.
That aside, Jefe started sending emails out back in April and through July that were backhanded insults:
" I don’t see anyone being serious here.",
"I want both of you to put little bit more effort this and next week",
"If we can’t even program this basic thing (which we knew from day one), how are we going to release this big system? I am losing confidence and it is not encouraging."
are just examples. Mind you these were coming in when I was busting my balls with overtime during the work week.
Needless to say the deadline was approaching and things were getting a bit hectic. Four or five weeks of working Saturdays and Sundays to get things done and life was nothing but go-go-go. Jefe was getting antsy and quite complainy... generally her dour mood was grating on everyone’s nerves.
Now in mid July my associate, Falloutboy, who was looking to get out of this team anyways had his "talking to" regarding his attitude. By the next week I got an email from Jefe indicating my talking would be that following week. That week came and went. Then Falloutboy and I were pulled into Jefe's office (at different times) to indicate we are being seen hanging out at work too much. Someone turned us in and complained. After much arguing with Jefe and I about Falloutboy's time it ended up being a '"15 pieces of flair" style of argument about his schedule and what working ONLY 40 hours a week is like (I commented below on it). Fine.. so pissy moods continue. I also opted to NOT hold back information from folks when they ask "Where's your partner in crime - falloutboy?". I told them what went down in brief and went about my business.
Fast forward to yesterday. Jefe puts out an email for standup meetings (a worthless 15ish minute meeting every morning that people mumble what they were doing.. they were stopped two months ago for lack of Jefe showing up and anyone caring), and I sent a decline with the option of just emailing her what I was doing. She sends an email back with "You don’t have a choice. This is my decision. If you don’t like, I will look for other options for you.", and I promptly replied with an acceptance to the meeting and an indication I was only joking. This apparently caused a row in her world totally unbeknownst to me.
Two days go by and it was now 10 am today. She comes in all quiet and starts going in about the email and how it hurt her badly. Then she continues about how she would NEVER say that to her bosses, and the other two elder members of teh team were trained by her and eventually they conformed to the world and are now her bestest friends. There was also implications that the Goldenboy has been known to fire folks (Goldenboy would be at Jefe's level but with a different team) (his team can do no wrong because they are a bunch of 'yes men' or so the rumor is). I wasn't sure why that was tossed out, but later she indicated something like my attitude and this email would have gotten me canned. Then came the circuitous torrent of information about the "reorg", people's perceptions, manager recommendation of team member trades, and so forth. That seg-wayed into a talk about no matter how bastardly we, the team, act she keeps that information from other managers. Never spreading a bad word about us and so forth. I am not sure if that came about because other folks heard about her talk to Falloutboy and I being too "chummy", or what. Maybe she was just saying that she's a great boss because she protects us from ourselves... I don't know. My paranoia believes the former.
Then Jefe transitions to a talk about the project and how we need to be more than people sitting in offices writing code, but a more collaborative effort. Mind you all the while I was throwing in funny comments to lighten the mood that was already palpably uncomfortable, and profusely apologizing to her about any offense she might have taken from the joke email. Round and around the conversation goes, and she finally gets up to leave in a bit happier looking mood than when she comes in. I don't think she likes confrontation much, but I could be wrong.
Regardless I am now at a quandary over how to take this. I was on the complete defensive because of the wrong interpretation of my meeting decline, and didn't have a chance to fire back about her emails over the course of a few months, her attitude that brings me down, and so forth. Damnit - she caught me off guard! I guess it's for the best. If I would have gone on the offensive I probably would be writing this jobless. grrrr...
I have been working under the belief that when this system is done I can get back to my orginal system and fix what the outsourcing folks have broke, and I can continue life in a happy mood. I am now considering when Falloutboy finally kicks out of this place to find a new job and leave as well. Maybe not. Life for the most part is comfortable here. We'll see. I just need to get home, tai chi it up, and get a drink... Put some distance between the talk and now.. ha.
That aside, Jefe started sending emails out back in April and through July that were backhanded insults:
" I don’t see anyone being serious here.",
"I want both of you to put little bit more effort this and next week",
"If we can’t even program this basic thing (which we knew from day one), how are we going to release this big system? I am losing confidence and it is not encouraging."
are just examples. Mind you these were coming in when I was busting my balls with overtime during the work week.
Needless to say the deadline was approaching and things were getting a bit hectic. Four or five weeks of working Saturdays and Sundays to get things done and life was nothing but go-go-go. Jefe was getting antsy and quite complainy... generally her dour mood was grating on everyone’s nerves.
Now in mid July my associate, Falloutboy, who was looking to get out of this team anyways had his "talking to" regarding his attitude. By the next week I got an email from Jefe indicating my talking would be that following week. That week came and went. Then Falloutboy and I were pulled into Jefe's office (at different times) to indicate we are being seen hanging out at work too much. Someone turned us in and complained. After much arguing with Jefe and I about Falloutboy's time it ended up being a '"15 pieces of flair" style of argument about his schedule and what working ONLY 40 hours a week is like (I commented below on it). Fine.. so pissy moods continue. I also opted to NOT hold back information from folks when they ask "Where's your partner in crime - falloutboy?". I told them what went down in brief and went about my business.
Fast forward to yesterday. Jefe puts out an email for standup meetings (a worthless 15ish minute meeting every morning that people mumble what they were doing.. they were stopped two months ago for lack of Jefe showing up and anyone caring), and I sent a decline with the option of just emailing her what I was doing. She sends an email back with "You don’t have a choice. This is my decision. If you don’t like, I will look for other options for you.", and I promptly replied with an acceptance to the meeting and an indication I was only joking. This apparently caused a row in her world totally unbeknownst to me.
Two days go by and it was now 10 am today. She comes in all quiet and starts going in about the email and how it hurt her badly. Then she continues about how she would NEVER say that to her bosses, and the other two elder members of teh team were trained by her and eventually they conformed to the world and are now her bestest friends. There was also implications that the Goldenboy has been known to fire folks (Goldenboy would be at Jefe's level but with a different team) (his team can do no wrong because they are a bunch of 'yes men' or so the rumor is). I wasn't sure why that was tossed out, but later she indicated something like my attitude and this email would have gotten me canned. Then came the circuitous torrent of information about the "reorg", people's perceptions, manager recommendation of team member trades, and so forth. That seg-wayed into a talk about no matter how bastardly we, the team, act she keeps that information from other managers. Never spreading a bad word about us and so forth. I am not sure if that came about because other folks heard about her talk to Falloutboy and I being too "chummy", or what. Maybe she was just saying that she's a great boss because she protects us from ourselves... I don't know. My paranoia believes the former.
Then Jefe transitions to a talk about the project and how we need to be more than people sitting in offices writing code, but a more collaborative effort. Mind you all the while I was throwing in funny comments to lighten the mood that was already palpably uncomfortable, and profusely apologizing to her about any offense she might have taken from the joke email. Round and around the conversation goes, and she finally gets up to leave in a bit happier looking mood than when she comes in. I don't think she likes confrontation much, but I could be wrong.
Regardless I am now at a quandary over how to take this. I was on the complete defensive because of the wrong interpretation of my meeting decline, and didn't have a chance to fire back about her emails over the course of a few months, her attitude that brings me down, and so forth. Damnit - she caught me off guard! I guess it's for the best. If I would have gone on the offensive I probably would be writing this jobless. grrrr...
I have been working under the belief that when this system is done I can get back to my orginal system and fix what the outsourcing folks have broke, and I can continue life in a happy mood. I am now considering when Falloutboy finally kicks out of this place to find a new job and leave as well. Maybe not. Life for the most part is comfortable here. We'll see. I just need to get home, tai chi it up, and get a drink... Put some distance between the talk and now.. ha.
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